


Forgiveness

by firefox49



Series: Rest & Recovery [2]
Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Forgiveness, M/M, Post-Episode: S01E06 Rare Species
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:07:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25315786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firefox49/pseuds/firefox49
Summary: "To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." -Lewis B. SmedesMistakes, overheard conversations, and secrets.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: Rest & Recovery [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1892266
Comments: 8
Kudos: 195





	1. The Climb

**Author's Note:**

> Not necessarily in the same timeline as the 1st part, but it has a similar vibe so I put them together. Enjoy!

It had been months since Geralt had seen Jaskier's face.

The last time was not on the mountaintop, however. It was in a dingy little tavern, not so far from that mountain's base.

"Jask."

"Go away, Geralt."

"I didn't mean it."

"That's not true. People don't say things they don't mean. They just forget they didn't mean to say them out loud until they're already said."

"I don't want you gone."

"Sure sounded like you did."

"I did in the moment. I was stressed, Jaskier. Saying it was a mistake."

"And yet you said it anyway." Jaskier got up somewhat unsteadily, leaving his ale behind. "Just leave me alone." He pushed past Geralt and out through the front door.

It was raining outside. How fitting.

"Where are you even going to go? Come on Jask, be reasonable." Geralt was grasping at threads, and he knew it. The bard's mind was made up.

"I'll FIGURE IT OUT!" He shouted back at him. _"_ _Leave me. THE HELL ALONE!"_

And Geralt did. It was painful and frustrating but denying him that request seemed like adding insult to injury. He simply endured feeling his chest contract every time he entered a tavern and heard the barkeep mention the bard with the lovely voice who had sang about him just days prior. He distracted himself with Ciri and tried not to think about how she deserved some music and fun in her life. Eventually Geralt stopped following him to make sure he was safe. It was too much, and Jaskier could handle himself well enough.

And now it had been months since Geralt had seen Jaskier's face and he didn't miss him any less than he did when Jaskier had stormed off in the pouring rain, drunk and angry and most of all hurt. Geralt had managed to hurt the one person who didn't flinch when he moved too quickly or raised his voice. Super.

That was what had Geralt moping over a pitcher of beer in the first shitty inn he'd encountered in this new town. It was late, and he'd let Ciri go up to her own room that night. He didn't much care about the jobs posted outside. The lightness of his coin purse told him he would need to care about them soon, but that was a problem for tomorrow.

A blonde woman approached him, her intentions obvious. Geralt considered it. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world to hear someone breathing in the same room as him again, even if it would cost. He shook off the thought. He'd only feel shittier in the morning. He grimaced at the woman and looked away, hoping she'd catch the message, but she sat down beside him anyway. 

"Not interested." Geralt made himself look more hostile than usual.

"Neither am I, anymore," she said, looking straight ahead. "You're mourning somebody."

Geralt pursed his lips. "Nobody died."

"I didn't say that. She left you, then."

He sighed. "Yeah. You could say that."

"How long ago?"

"I stopped keeping track. Months."

"Ah, so you were the one who fucked it up, then."

Geralt felt defensiveness flare in his chest, but she was right. He took another swig before replying. "Yeah. I did."

"And did you try to apologize to her?"

"H- She didn't want to hear it." He didn't know why he was telling her this. She had the kind of soft brown eyes you instinctively trusted. "I had to let her go."

"What did you do that was so awful? Did you hit her?"

Geralt recoiled at the very thought. She noticed his eyes widen. "I got angry. I wasn't violent, I never could have, but I- I said I wanted to be alone. That I wanted her to leave."

She nodded. "But you didn't mean it."

"I did in the moment. I was frustrated. I didn't realize how much damage I'd do." He looked down. "I'd give anything to take it back." Geralt's voice got soft at the end. He had to take a moment to swallow the lump in his throat. "We'd been together for so long that- that I never actually could envision being separate. The road is a lot lonelier when you know what it's like with company. And people like me don't find company often. But with hi- her I felt... a little more human. Like more of a man than a monstrosity. I just wish she knew. I wish I could go back and say it all different, but I can't, and it tears me apart. I don't... I don't think I'd ever really been... in love... before we traveled together." Geralt hadn't been this close to tears since his boyhood. Determined to regain some sort of dignity in the near-empty inn, he looked down at his hands and fell silent.

"I think I understand."

"Thank you for listening," he replied, glancing back at her, "but I don't think you do."

"No, I understand." She turned to him, making eye contact. "She wasn't a she at all, was she? She was a he."

Geralt paused, glass halfway to his lips. "How the hell would you know that?" The woman just nodded at something past him. Geralt turned around.

And there was Jaskier. Halfway across the threshold, looking slightly more ragged than usual, mouth shut tight and jaw tense. In the torchlight Geralt almost thought he was crying. "Geralt." He stepped inside tentatively, giving a formal nod that did not match the rest of his body language.

Geralt stood up, almost fast enough to knock over the barstool. "Jask."

Jaskier gave him a look that said _it seems we have a lot to talk about._

Geralt could only nod stiffly as he watched Jaskier go to find the innkeeper and book a room. Once he had he gave Geralt a long look and walked up the stairs. Geralt still hadn't moved. He turned to look at the woman, who was still sitting beside him.

"What are you waiting for?" She looked at him with an incredulous expression. He nodded, trying to convey his thanks with his eyes, and followed Jaskier.


	2. The Tumble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Forgiveness is the purest form of love."

The hallway was cramped, but there were no other patrons in the inn and the innkeeper had retreated downstairs. Geralt seemed awkwardly big in the narrow space, too broad, too clunky.

Thoughts were racing around Jaskier's head like wasps, very prominent but too fast to make sense of. Love? Geralt had actually said the word _love_ in reference to him. Unless, of course, there were another, female companion Jaskier had just never heard of. He doubted it. Geralt's only female companions were crazy witches or paid to be there. Jaskier, on the other hand, had been there unfailingly with him for longer than most would believe. Love was never a thought that crossed his mind, though. At least, it wasn't a thought he allowed to cross his mind. That one stayed locked up in a birdcage, fluttering about irreverently and with no regard to Jaskier's admonishment. It was sounding every bell now, going off like a canary in a coal mine as he listened to Geralt's ginger footsteps behind him. It was endearing, really, how hard he tried to make himself smaller. It didn't work, but it was endearing nonetheless.

Still not looking the witcher in the eyes, Jaskier put his back to the door. He stared intensely at his shoes, wondering how one responds to overhearing one's best friend confess their love for them to a total stranger. When he looked up, Geralt's face was absolutely pitiful. He'd never seen him so vulnerable in his life: his brow was fraught with worry, his eyes were watery, his lips were drawn into a tight line.

"Listen," Geralt began, but Jaskier had listened enough. Linking his hands around the back of Geralt's neck, he pulled him down into a kiss.

Emotions he hadn't realized he'd pushed down bubbled up from under the surface almost overwhelmingly. He found himself leaning further into Geralt's arms, which had wrapped themselves around his waist, and twisting his fingers in Geralt's hair. It was tangled and matted, like nobody had combed it for weeks.

Jaskier pulled back only so he could look into Geralt's eyes, which were shiny and almost hollow with desperation, but the worried lines around them had relaxed. Without breaking the embrace, he twisted the doorknob behind him and led Geralt backwards into the room. Geralt followed, closing the door behind him and cupping Jaskier's face in his hands in a way that shattered his heart. "Whatever I do," Geralt breathed, face inches from Jaskier's, "don't leave me again." It was more of a plea than a demand.

Jaskier let out a teary laugh. "You'll have a hard time getting rid of me now, darling." Geralt's face cracked into the closest thing it had made to a smile in months. He picked Jaskier up easily and lay him softly on the bed, Jaskier grabbing onto his collar and pulling him down with him.

\---

Geralt liked the way Jaskier smelled. He would catch errant whiffs of it when they rode side by side or shared a room, but now he was free to bury his nose into Jaskier's hair and bask in the scent. It had almost a spice to it, something that caught at the back of your throat and grabbed your attention. Jaskier's breathing was slow and even, and in sleep he was wrapped around Geralt like it was the most natural thing in the world. Geralt couldn't help but stare. He let out a contented hum in harmony with the crickets chirping outside.

Jaskier let out a noise that sent vibrations through Geralt's chest but was indecipherable.

"What?"

Jaskier turned his head to the side. His eyes were still closed. "I said, are you going to say it, or shall I?"

"It's too early for your riddles, Jask."

"I suppose that's me, then. My life is significantly worse without your company, witcher. I should be delighted if you would let me tag along again." Jaskier tilted his nose up to look into Geralt's eyes. Geralt couldn't help but smile.

"Well, if you insist."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the tasteful non-sex scene. We keep things G-rated here, folks!


End file.
